Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Vegan Who Ate My Face

Sometimes I just feel like I have to write.
Or rather, I want to write because I want to feel important. I rarely have anything important to say, but putting it all out there into the anonymous world of the internet somehow makes me feel important. I am a speck, but I am a totally kick ass speck.
The past few months have been...interesting. I had a relationship with Mystery Girl. Mystery Girl was great, but circumstances made it difficult for the relationship to continue.
Also, I came to terms with my height a long time ago- get over it world.
One of my friends recommended that I remove my height from my online dating profile, stating that she thought the reason I was having problems making that initial point of contact was that some of these people are "shallow" and can't look past my height.
Even if that's the case, I'm 5'4", and I have been for years. My height helped to make me who I am today (try being the short kid in grade school...not fun). I'm not going to hide that.

Separately, I went to a concert- Bomb the Music Industry! to be specific. I met up with friends and had a great time in general, and a woman there was, as the kids say, all up on me. It culminated in her assaulting me with he mouth during the headliner's set for the sloppiest make out I have had in a long while. It made me feel like an idiot college kid again. Unlike that idiot kid though, I got her number and we met up later.

We had everything in common except we were terrible for each other.

Also she's a vegan and I am not. For someone who enjoys cooking (me), this is a pretty awkward situation.

"Hi honey, I made chicken."
"Um..."
"Grilled Cheese?"
"Um..."
"I made raw spinach?"

This is a fake conversation.

Regardless, it was an awkward date seeing as she did not remember much about eating my face at the concert.

I'm feeling weird, though. After listening to Frank Turner non-stop and going to see "Scott Pilgrim vs. The World" (P.S. Go see this movie right fucking now. Are you back? Good!) something has switched inside my head/heart combo. I am not fully sure what the hell happened, but I'm sure I'll write about it here in overly dramatic fashion.
I don't know how to explain it, but I feel young at heart again, like, before I had my heart ripped out the first time.

Later dudes,

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