The students are coming back. This is daunting. I've been here for almost a year and I'm just now feeling that year and the job. It's not a bad thing, just a new sensation, and something else I am going to have to get used to feeling.
I've tried working in a new way with Magic, trying to fully explore an idea before moving eagerly to the next one. This will hopefully allow me to see things with clarity and thoughtfulness and help me to improve my game.
It's annoying because I had a great subject today, and I totally forgot what i wanted to talk about. It was a story from my past that is utterly appropriate to my current situation, but I really cannot remember.
I tip toe around my ex a lot, mostly because until relatively recently, I was not really over her. Needless to say, she fucked my head over rather badly. Basically, I cared about her, but at one of the hardest points in my life, she left me hanging. To be fair, I did move away to grad school, but after what I had gone through to be there for her during her rough times, I thought I had earned some slack. Alas, it was not to be. What's annoyed me is that it's taken me three years, almost, to move on. I don't like this. wake up in the morning, and still think I'm 17, and then I think I'm 21, then 23, and then I realize I'm 25 and am damn close to 26. It's scary sometimes. I think of all I have accomplished, and all there is in front of me. I think about how long a year is, and yet how little I've done with my life n the last year...y'know, aside from moving and starting a career and generally starting life as an adult.
Adult. what a weird word. I'm still a kid at heart- I find all the same things funny, except now my knees crack occasionally.
I'm kinda tired, kinda out of it, and just ready to move forward. Hopefully, I'll be able to swing a second date with someone.